What Is Loyalty?

Loyalty is defined by the Oxford Languages Dictionary as ‘a strong feeling of support or allegiance.’. I value loyalty most of all in my husband, my friends, and my family.

Loyalty is easiest to define between a couple in a committed relationship. My husband and I put each other above any other person. We are fiercely loyal to one another. We look out for each other’s needs, and always have each other’s back.

We also have loyal friends and family, who reciprocate this with us. We care a great deal about these, as they do us. We retain confidences’, we share hopes and joys, as well as grief and sorrow. We all want what is best for one another. We all want each other to be happy, and content in life.

My husband and I are also loyal to our children, and they to us. It is an entirely different brand of loyalty with children. As they grow, and learn, they are discovering who they are, and who they want to be. As long as their first loyalty is with the self, my husband and I are happy.

Our oldest are fast entering the age when they want to establish themselves in their group of friends. They want to prove their loyalties to their friends, and so sometimes push the boundaries we have set for them. As parents though, our loyalty to them includes standing firm with our boundaries, and to always be there with open arms when they need us, no matter what. Not just to say we would, but actively practice this.

“I belong to the people I love, and they belong to me- they, and the love and loyalty I give them, form my identity far more than any word or group ever could.” – Veronica Roth

What could be more true than this? Where would we be without love; and without those we love, who also love us.

We’ve all been there. You think you know where you are with someone. You are loyal to them, and you believe this is reciprocated. Then you overhear an unfortunate conversation, or witness something you wish you hadn’t, to show you were wrong to believe they had any loyalty to you. You confront them, and they don’t see what the big deal is, seem confused that you would be upset. You move on, but add a little protective barrier to yourself.

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